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PURPOSE, JOY AND POSITIVES

WAITING vs. PATIENCE:

This is a fact of life is it not? When we were younger we waited to become a teenager, then to get the driver’s license, then to turn a legal 21, then to find the right career, partner, first house, to have a family, to get the big promotion, also  waiting in line at the grocery store or the DVM. Even the grapes in the crate above are waiting to be processed into delicious wine! Waiting escapes no one!

Sometimes, the waiting we experience throughout our lives can turn to frustration or even disappointment, especially if we have been waiting a long time for a certain event and the outcome isn’t what we expected or wanted. So, let’s consider an alternative to the feeling of continually waiting…..patience. As my dear mother use to say to me (and often): patience is a virtue!

Patience doesn’t mean that we become powerless and give up, rather, it can be empowering in that we wait, observe and determine when and how to act. One author, Judith Orloff, M.D.  in her article The Power of Patience (September, 2012)  presents the idea of patience as a “form of compassion, a re-attuning to intuition, a way to emotionally redeem your center in a world filled with frustration”.  She further says that she is defining patience as an “active state, a choice to hold tight until intuition says….make your move. It means waiting your turn, knowing your turn will come.”

Easier said than done sometimes, right? However, in life timing is everything and that means you have to ‘wait’ till the correct opportunity presents itself, trusting that the ‘wait’ will be worth it. The key word….trusting the wait.

I also think that maybe sometimes we ‘wait’ on the wrong things…….maybe there are just some things that we should not be waiting for. Worth a few moments in thought I think. Maybe in the big scope of life, a few things we thought were worth the wait, just really don’t matter.

“Adopt the pace of nature; her secret is patience”  Ralph Waldo Emerson.

PJP

PURPOSE, JOY AND POSITIVES

GRACE:

There are several meanings of the word GRACE, one of which is ‘unmerited Divine assistance given to humans’ (Merriam-Webster Dictionary). It is freely given and filled with numerous blessings. It cannot be earned, stolen, nor is it based on our worthiness. GRACE …. just is simply GRACE with no attachments, surrounding us, waiting for us to be aware of GRACE, experience it, and use it.

I recently had lunch with a dear friend and we were talking about prayer and how we have developed our prayer life and changes we have added/deleted over time. She reminded me that we should include asking for GRACE in our daily prayers. As I pondered our conversation on the drive home, I realized that I have sort of been taking for granted that I am praying for GRACE automatically in my prayers, that  it is an all inclusive deal in prayer.  However, as I thought more about this, I realized I am wrong about that. I need to specifically ask for GRACE …….and so I started doing just that. It has been interesting to me to note that a few things have happened in the last couple of weeks that I believe were the direct result of the Lord answering my prayer for GRACE.

Our response to GRACE is to live our days here on earth showing GRACE to others with a sense of gratitude, generosity and kind gentleness with those we come in contact with. Our heart and soul can be filled with as much GRACE as we can be aware of. There is no limit. But we must indeed return it to others in our world and beyond in all ways.

“Life is measured in love and positive contributions and moments of grace” ( Carly Fiorina, American business woman and author).

Write down your moments of GRACE each day for five days and then review at the end of that time. I am sure you will find “Amazing Grace”.

 

PJP

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

PURPOSE, JOY AND POSITIVES

WE I.D.!!   Do we?

I. D.  …..can refer to an ID card or document that verifies we are who we say we are, user ID’s  for our personal technology devices, the ID number of a vehicle etc. Literally, it means identity.

We all have various types of identities: work, family, emotional, spiritual, community…… just to name a few. Perhaps, the most important identity we have is our authentic identity. That core of self that does not wear a mask; that self that is beneath our darkest fears; that raw emotion that is buried deep in our heart. Thus, the authenticity of our deepest being. Sometimes, it takes a lifetime to find our true identity, the type that is really authentic; and a lifetime plus to allow our true identity to bubble up to the surface of our daily lives. There are hurts, pains, wounds, traumas and life experiences, as well as the people in our lives that shape our identity. Sorting it all out can be a daunting task that will evolve during our journey.

I.D……yes, we must work at finding our true identity; the one that shapes our PURPOSE and brings us the greatest JOY in our lives.

WE need to I.D. …….every day, every week, every month, always. How can you I.D. Today?

Maya Angelou says it well: “We have to confront ourselves. Do we like what we see in the mirror? And, according to our light, according to our understanding, according to our courage, we will have to say yea or nay——and rise!”

 

PURPOSE, JOY AND POSITIVES

WHERE ARE YOU ON THE ROAD?

As we walk this path of life, sometimes we will be in the sunshine of good times and all is going well. Other times, we may be in the shade; maybe we are resting or maybe we are not able to find our way back to the sun because something is blocking our vision. Is it an actual obstacle or just our perception that it is blocking our moving forward?

Who is on your journey with you? Sometimes, we find ourselves in front of our journey partner and sometimes we are behind. We might have to slow our pace and allow them to get to where we are. Or perhaps, we have to work on ourselves to catch up. It isn’t a race or a competition; no, it is a journey of collaboration by design…..to be truly with and present to the journey. This will be the heart of our story.

On my journey in 2020, I have chosen the word GRACE to accompany and guide me. It is interesting that after much thought in searching and choosing this word, nearly every day at least once it comes up in something that I read! One of the things I want to experience is to acknowledge and use the graces I am given each day to the best of my ability.

How is your 2020 journey thus far?

PJP

PURPOSE, JOY AND POSITIVES

WELCOME NEW YEAR 2020!!

Here we go……new days, new weeks, new months, new year AND a new decade!!

Where were you last year at this time mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually?  How did you progress into and end the year 2019 in these areas?

What did you let go of last year  that was toxic in your  life or no longer was positively purposeful?

What did you accomplish that you planned or what was achieved that you did not plan?

Did you take a new path at a cross road on your life journey?

These are just some of the questions that we ask ourselves as we contemplate stepping out of the comfort of 2019 and into the unknowns of 2020.

When it is all said and done, we all have the positives and the negatives that we remember from 2019. Being grateful for both, and the silver linings that emerged from even the negatives, should be a part of our reflections. Sometimes, yes, we do have to search for those silver linings, but they are there.

Happy 2020 to each of you and Blessings for a healthy, peaceful and life filled with your purpose and joy.

PJP

PURPOSE, JOY AND POSITIVES

ADVENT AND HOPE:

It is only 10 short days until we celebrate the Birth of Our Lord, the culmination of the Advent Season of preparing and waiting. In our faith, Advent is the beginning of the “New Liturgical Year”.  I have noted that each message during the homily this Advent is centered around HOPE, which is deeply encouraging, given the state of our world, some things in our personal lives and the various shifts in life many of us may be experiencing. The message has been that HOPE is a gift in our lives, one to be used and experienced, not only for ourselves but in ways to serve others, building them up and encouraging them. As I thought about this, I decided to reach out to someone that I thought could use encouragement and HOPE. There was not a response, but I HOPE that the message may  have helped in some way.

When I think of HOPE, I think of possibilities,  of new beginnings,  and the letting go of cumbersome worries, among just a few of the thoughts. I believe that it is HOPE that keeps up moving forward and not mired in the ‘downs’ or challenges we face. If we have HOPE, we have everything! It is not over; it is going to come to fruition, in the way that has been chosen for us by HIM. On December 25, the waiting and preparing, each in our own spiritual way, will come to fruition as Our Lord will arrive once again to bring us HOPE…..for us, our families, our lives, and our world.

Continue on in your preparations for the coming of the greatest HOPE there is.

PJP

PURPOSE, JOY AND POSITIVES

BLESSINGS:

In my morning mediations yesterday, the question was ‘what blessings have you received this year?’ I started thinking about that and continued to read the second question, which is what I have spent the last couple of days reflecting on: ‘who have you blessed this year?’

We certainly all have many blessings in our lives, some of which we have not yet uncovered in our consciousness.  Sometimes, in retrospect, a blessing comes forth from tragedy/hurt/ pain or suffering.  I am grateful for the many blessings in my life and would have a difficult time choosing my greatest blessing.

’Who have you blessed in the last year?’ I can think of a few people  that I have done things for that could be counted, but I am sure I could do more. When you think about it, ‘the who’ you have blessed is equally as important as the ‘what blessings’. Blessings that you give to others come in so many different categories…….listening to a friend tell the story yet again, reading a book to a child, giving a compliment, holding a door, giving another your place in line at the grocery store, running an errand for someone because you are already at that store, saying ‘I’m really sorry’, asking for and/or giving forgiveness, stopping to say hello to someone who is all alone, calling someone you have not talked to for awhile just to ‘catch up and let them know you are thinking about them’. Notably, none of these cost money; they involve your time, which is your blessing to the other.

Let’s have a Thanksgiving week of blessing others as many times as we can. They say 21 days and something becomes habit. That would be a good 21+ days wouldn’t it!!

May you have a BLESSED THANKSGIVING!

PJP

 

PURPOSE, JOY AND POSITIVES

FINDING YOU FOR A MOMENT:

November 1st marks the beginning of the countdown season to the holidays! So much to do, so little time, right? Let’s think about that for a minute.

We all  have an internal reserve of emotional, physical, spiritual and mental energy which can deplete quickly in times of stress, worry, trauma, and/or illness. I didn’t even address the just ‘busyness’ of everyday life in balancing work, family and outside commitments. Everyone, but your personal self, usually gets addressed……you find a way to make it all work, and sometimes that is at the expense of any personal time for you. We all need that ‘you’ time and this is not being selfish; it is a necessity. We can only be at our best in any area of life when we are fulfilled emotionally, feeling healthy, renewed spiritually and mentally in sync with the other three areas.

Maybe as we begin a new month, it is time for each of us to find 15 minutes each day that belong to no one but ourselves. Start with just 15 minutes and expand it when and if you can. Maybe it means getting up a half hour earlier when the house hold has not yet awakened, or staying up a little later, or maybe even spending our lunch hour in solitude, or maybe using that 15 minute afternoon break for you. The important aspect is that you decide when it will be, commit to that time by putting it in writing in your daily schedule and decide how that time will most benefit you…..which does not include figuring out what’s for dinner, how far to stretch the budget, tomorrow’s deadline or making mental lists of who you need to call.

Some ideas for this ‘you’ rejuvenation might include journaling, prayer, meditation, quietly listening to relaxing music while you deep breathe to the beat, or simply just sitting, breathing and letting your heart be filled up. I have found that when I stay in the rhythm of doing this daily, over time my relaxation gets deeper and the rejuvenation lasts longer.

I recommit to starting this practice again today. When will you start?

”We must always change, renew, rejuvenate ourselves; otherwise we harden”  John Wolfgang von Goethe,  author, statesman, and poet 1749-1832.

PJP

 

 

 

PURPOSE, JOY AND POSITIVES

COPING WITH GRIEF:

As we move closer to the Holiday Season, many of us will be coping with grief, like it or not. Grief will  be a part of our lives, earlier or later; it is part of being human.

There will be the expected loneliness and being alone as well as missing ‘what used to be’. We will need  some solitude to heal and rejuvenate.

There is a difference between loneliness and solitude. We grieve in both, just in different ways. Most of us would not choose loneliness, but I suggest we should chose solitude within this loneliness to meditate, pray, reflect  and heal.

Let’s shift to how we might manage this grief. Coping encompasses four different things as sited  from Horizon Grief Resource Center, Fall, 2019 Volume 10, Issue 3. 

“First, use your support network effectively. Secondly, meet  new people with like interests. Third, get out in your community…take a class, join a club, volunteer. Lastly, honor your loneliness and give yourself permission to cry when you feel lonely.”

Just like the picture above, grief is  a journey and sometimes it feels like you walk that path endlessly,  with nothing but more of the same ahead of you. But in my own experience, one day the walk gets easier and you come upon a meadow where you receive some rest before you continue on in the healing.

If you are grieving a loss, may you find the coping skills that are right for you and move toward your ‘meadow’.

PJP